Classical Sass

For a beloved, with tears and much unruly angst.

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I am posting a piece of my friend, Kate, at her request. I agree with her re Deadpool.


And The Golden Globe For Best Leaving Medium Speech Goes To…

Guess Who?? Yep. Me!!!

I’d Like To Thank The Academy…

So firstly — a big howdy to anyone (so that’s 2.5 people worldwide) not busy dissing the fact that Deadpool didn’t win the entire Golden Globes — I ask you, how is this even possible, by the way — a topic to be explored elsewhere, I am afeared, although happiness is present in my little dark heart about Hugh Laurie and Meryl Legendary Streep’s wins, and words of extreme wisdom –

– and there I go. Straight off topic, into my customary essay. This was supposed to be short, if not all that sweet.

You may have figured out by the simple fact of this monster sized ‘I’d like to thank…’ being delivered by the great good graces of the wondrous Classical Sass that I am, as they say, leaving the building. Not, I hasten to add, in a wooden box (although there are a few who may wish it so); perhaps I should rephrase, and say I am leaving the platform.

This morning, something associated with Medium happened which made me, for more than a moment, forget a maxim I try to live by — the wonderful words of Eleanor Roosevelt:

No-one can make you feel inferior without your consent.

This morning, I consented to feeling inferior.

And I didn’t like it.

I didn’t like it at all.

Despite my suave public persona that marries the elegance of Audrey in Roman Holiday with a few drops of Marilyn Monroe’s frailty and naïveté, a very large dash of Kate Hepburn (I’m partial to the Philadelphia Story Kate) snark, and a mahoosive amount of Dorothy Parker wit and witty repartée**, I bruise like a Georgia peach. My emotions are shot to pieces with a word, because writer, and because empath.

With respect to the last sentence; I think the latter noun needs to be interchangeable with the former, if you want to be any good at said former.

I’m not talking about editorial criticism; anyone who has spent time at the Huff Post or NewsCorp coalface knows the value of good, constructive, edits. It makes you a better, tighter, more focused writer.

I’m talking about criticism of personal ethics and moral values.

This is not intended as a ‘who did’, or ‘who said’. It is not intended to cause disharmony, or speculative thinking. For all I know, nobody will give a rat’s arse I am gone. But I wanted to say a big, wholehearted thank you to those people who gave me heart and hope on here, and to say I will miss you with my whole heart, and hope you remember me with kindness. I have tried to behave with honour, to harangue with good intent, and to give praise where praise was due — and so much praise was due, to so many, not just for writing beautiful words, but for providing beautiful support.

I will still be writing at my own site, which I have almost totally abandoned due to the fun I have had on here, and I hope those of you who wish to will visit me there.

Thank you for the many kindnesses you have collectively shown me, especially at the very toughest time of my life — right now.

And don’t let anyone make you feel inferior. Ever.

Special big, you carry my heart oh my god i just ripped off e e cummings shitbiscuits thanks to:

Blood of my ex-Brrrrownie blood Jules, my true and beloved Mentor David Moser, borne wilder, elizabeth tobey, Chad Grills — the first publisher to (stupidly) take a chance on a person with about three followers, Gerard Mclean, Gail Boenning, Will Churchill, Jeffrey Field, Aura Wilming, S Lynn Knight, Sherry Kappel, Sherry Caris, Jonas Ellison, Jess Schwendinger (Perth get together coming up, missy), Eric Beversluis, Ronald C. Flores-Gunkle, Sarah Goldsmith, Michelle Stone, and lots of other people whom I am going to feel intensely terrible about not mentioning the moment I send this to Sass, of course the amazing Sassafras, and beautiful Tre, whom I know is lurking somewhere, and without whom I would never have published a word of verse — the first words of which I’d ever written were here, you guessed it, on Medium.

You know who you all are anyway. Thank you.

A final wise word, before I go, not from me, but from the aforementioned goddess, Meryl Streep, whom I am choosing as one of my stars in my Best Screenplay Adapted From An Original Novel Or Stage Production (also written by me — hey, a girl’s gotta dream, right), speaking of her late, dear friend, the indomitable Carrie Fisher, out there wreaking havoc in the multiverse –

As my friend, the dear departed Princess Leia, said to me once: take your broken heart, make it into art.

That is the essence of writing. That is the heartbeat of Medium. I know it will keep going, and you are all a part of it. Thank you for allowing me the privilege of being a part of its steady pulse for this short while.

And now, until we meet again, in the words and pictures of the awesome Gary Larson:


**Total and utter fantasy life. I actually resemble Miss Piggy from The Muppets.

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